Remy Porter

Remy is a veteran developer who provides software for architectural installations with IonTank.

He's often on stage, doing improv comedy, but insists that he isn't doing comedy- it's deadly serious. You're laughing at him, not with him. That, by the way, is usually true- you're laughing at him, not with him.

Go Forth, Young Programmer

by in Feature Articles on

The past is another planet, but a familiar one. Back in the far off year of 1989, Rick Poleshuck took a job with a company that made a computer product for nurses's stations in hospitals. Now, this product was for notes, and it was an "all inclusive" product- software, proprietary hardware, networking, terminals, everything. And it was written in Forth.

Now, this is what we might call a "classic Forth" system, and in such a system, Forth ran on bare metal. No OS, no filesystem, and a simple scheduler. This was also the system they developed on: the source just lived in raw 1KB blocks on the hard disk, and they edited blocks directly. That's not a WTF, that's just how things were done in that environment.


The Whiteboard Challenge

by in Tales from the Interview on

Like many of us, Igor F keeps his LinkedIn profile vaguely up to date with his career, and that means he inevitably gets messages from recruiters trying to find talent for the latest trendy startup, or the big stable company struggling to find developers happy to work in its code mines, or the contracting company trying to staff up.

Igor usually ignored the pitch, but one recruiter said they were representing a startup in a domain that Igor was really interested in, and was hinting that they had money to burn.


A Match Made In…

by in CodeSOD on

Andy C writes:

One of our colleagues dug this code up from an outsourced project. Took a few us to try to find out what it actually does, we're still not completely sure.


Callback Bondage

by in CodeSOD on

"Garbage collected languages can't have memory leaks," is well established as a myth, but we still have plenty of code which refuses to clean up after itself properly.

An anonymous submitter was working with a single-page-app front-end which wraps a stream abstraction around a websocket. Messages arrive on the stream, and callbacks get invoked. When certain parameters change, new callbacks need to be registered to handle the new behavior. The old callbacks need to be unbound- and it's that step this code doesn't do.


Put in Order

by in CodeSOD on

Rust is one of the "cool" languages these days. It promises all the low-level power of C with memory safety and "modern" programming conventions like iterables and maps. High performance, expressive language, low-level power seems like a great combination for certain domains.

Now, Jenna Winchester needed to do some Morton Coding or Z-indexing, which is an algorithm which lets you take multidimensional points and turn them into 1-dimensional points in a way that maintains their spatial relationships- essentially a fast way of traversing a quadtree. It's a fairly simple and fast algorithm, especially if you implement it using bitwise operations. A naive implementation, without optimizations, can do its job with very few CPU cycles, relatively speaking.


It's a Gift

by in Feature Articles on

Tyra was standing around the coffee maker with her co-workers when their phones all dinged with an email from management.

Edgar is no longer employed at Initech. If you see him on the property, for any reason, please alert security.


Going Backwards

by in Feature Articles on

Nearly 15 years ago, fresh out of college, Giuseppe was hired on at a mobile networking company. The company wasn't a software company, but since they were heavy in networking and could handle all sorts of weird technical problems there, software must basically be the same thing, so they also started producing applications to manage those networks.

It didn't take them long to discover that "building networks" and "writing software" are different skillsets, and so they did what every company with some room in the budget does: they hire a pack of Highly Paid Consultants to get their project on track.


Copy Paste Paste Paste Paste

by in CodeSOD on

"Hey," someone on Russell F's team said. "We should add some keyboard navigation to our web app." That struck everyone as an "easy win", specifically because they were really talking about making "enter" and "escape" do something useful.

They wrote some quick requirements, passed it off, and the developer submitted a surprisingly long pull request. Russell passed a sample of three out of the dozens of methods:


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