Andre was finishing writing documentation before he clocked-out for a much needed, 2-week vacation. He had stocked up his fridge with beer, energy drinks, and cola. He planned on working on raids with his gaming guild. He hadn't been as active as he liked lately, and was really looking forward to the break.

Andre's phone buzzed. He looked and saw Bob was calling. Bob struggled with the most basic of tasks, but worked in a large enterprise. His department contracted out to Andre to help offset the problem of their sales department.

It's a holiday in the US, where we catalog the things we're thankful for. I'm thankful that developers collectively learned to understand how databases work, and didn't start releasing databases that stored flexible documents with no real schema and could just be used as a data dump. That would be terrible! This classic WTF illustrates that. Originally. --Remy

J.T. is not well liked amongst the developers at his organization. As a Database Administrator, it's J.T's job to make sure that database structures and queries maintain data integrity and do not put an unnecessarily load on the server. This often gets in the way of the developers, who prefer to think of the database as a giant dump site where data gets thrown and is rummaged through to be retrieved. Things like "indexes," "valid data," and "naming conventions" are merely obstacles put in place by J.T. to make their life harder.

Generally, the submission-review-rejection procedure happens once or twice with most of the developers. But one particular developer -- a newly hired ".NET Wizard" named Frank -- turns the procedure into a daily cycle that drags on for several weeks. Following is Frank's reply to the first in a chain of rejections on a project that Frank was leading up ...